I had my chance (SKATE)
by Readergirl24
Summary: When Kate finds out about Juliet and Sawyer, what are her thoughts and feelings? Set during season 5. Please review! x


Before the island

**Disclaimer: I don't own lost**

**About: Set during 'He's our you'. Kate finds out about Sawyer and Juliet, but what's she thinking and feeling inside? **

Kate sat at the lunch table, listening to Jack and Hurley's conversation about Sayid. What had they got themselves into? If only Sayid had been with them, they wouldn't have all this trouble about him. He could've become part of the dharma initiative too, if only they'd found him in time. The conversation turned to Sawyer, and Kate decided to try and help.

"I'll talk to Juliet, see what she can tell me."

"Well, if Sawyer didn't tell you anything, why would Juliet?"

Kate was puzzled. What did he mean? "Well, why wouldn't she?" Hurley looked a bit like he didn't want to say anything, but then he decided he should.

"'Cause they're together." Kate was stunned into silence. Of course Sawyer had fallen for a woman. What had she expected? For him to still be in love with her? She'd never even thought about that, the fact that Sawyer might've fallen for someone else. Kate had to check that Hurley had meant what he'd said.

"What do you mean, they're together?"

Hurley looked at her oddly. ""Together" as... They live together. Like, not as roommates. You know, "together" like you guys were. I thought it was kind of obvious. I mean, who couldn't see that comin'?" She hadn't. She'd never thought about him and Juliet. She knew this was stupid. It had been three years. Sawyer had to be one of the most attractive guys on the planet, she'd admit that. Why wouldn't he of fallen for someone else? Maybe she was no different from any of the other women he'd met.

"Hurley." That was Jack. He, at least, knew what Kate was thinking about. Hurley suddenly remembered the whole 'Sawyer and Kate' thing, and looked down uneasily.

"Well, I guess I better... Go make some more waffles." Hurley left, and Kate looked at Jack. He certainly didn't seem too surprised.

"Did you know?" Kate asked him.

Jack nodded his head. "Yeah." Of course Jack had known. But he hadn't told her. He obviously thought that it would hurt her too much. Kate didn't know what to say. She stared down at the food in front of her, and felt like she was about to be sick.

"Hmm." Was all she could say to break the silence. Jack took one last look at her, and then muttered something about having to go and talk to Hurley. Kate watched him go, and then got up to leave herself. She needed time to think.

She shouldn't feel jealous. She had, after all, agreed to marry Jack. That was even more that what had happened between Juliet and Sawyer. She knew Juliet was pretty, prettier than her. But Sawyer had made Kate feel special. She'd known since the kiss, all those months ago, years ago, even, that they had a connection. She'd always felt they had so much in common. She'd always felt like she was special to him, like they'd always have something.

Kate looked around, at all the people laughing and smiling. She saw Juliet in the corner, talking happily to one of her Dharma friends. Juliet was friendly, happy and beautiful. Of course Sawyer would like her. "You shouldn't be jealous." She told herself angrily.

She could've had a relationship with him. If she'd jumped off the helicopter after him, they could've been together. Had a child, maybe. They could've lived happily in the Dharma initiative, on the island. It was her fault she was feeling like this; broken-hearted, dismal and depressed. She had thought she'd moved on, when she was back in the real world. She'd almost married Jack, and the only thing reminding her of Sawyer was Cassidy, and Clementine.

She still remembered the last time they'd kissed, before he'd jumped off the helicopter. A tear had rolled down her cheek, but she hadn't shown her full sorrow. She'd never told him she loved him, never told him her true feelings. Why would he of remembered her, why would he not move on? This was reality; this was the cause of her leaving Sawyer. It was all because she left.

**So, how did you think it was? Please leave a review, tell me what you think! x**


End file.
